User blog:High Prince Imrahil/The Wiki Family Part 4: The Tina Incident

Imrahil stepped out of the Happy Dragon, and put the food into the back of his car. He was just shutting the door, when he heard a familiar voice behind him...



"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey, Immiekinz! I missed you!"



Imrahil whirled around, to see a gorgeous girl with fiery red hair running towards him. It was Tina "Murdock" Toshiba, his insane former girlfriend.

"Oh, Immy, it's been so long since I've seen you!" she said, throwing her arms around his neck "Are you having dinner at your house? Can I come? I can come, can't I? C'mon, I won't eat much!"



"Uh..." Imrahil found himself stunned, as he often did in her presence. She was beautiful, chatty, and talked at the speed of light, a recipe for bewildering him very quickly



"Uh... I guess you could come for dinner" he said shakily



"REALLY?!" she said, kissing him on the cheek "I LOVE your family!! Thanks!!"



In a flash of red hair, she leapt into the passenger seat of his Camaro



Imrahil walked to his own side very slowly. What had he done?! Tina always ended up railroading him into things, that's why he had broken up with her in the first place... if 'break up' was the correct term. She was still always hanging around, lurking in the shadows of his life, flying out of nowhere when he least expected it.

<p class="MsoNormal">"When least expected" pretty much summed up Tina entirely. She called herself a "Wildcard" and always prided herself on being entirely unpredictable. Imrahil thought back to his days in High School, when they were dating...

<p class="MsoNormal">He heard things like "Hey Imrahil, I painted your Camaro pink while you were asleep... 'cause I'm a WILDCARD!" "Hey Imrahil, I spiked the punch at prom with vodka... 'cause I'm a WILDCARD!!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil shook his head, trying to rid himself of the lingering memories. And slowly, he slid into the driver's seat of his Camaro

<p class="MsoNormal">Tina smiled at him, her white teeth shining, eyelashes fluttering, and long red hair falling all about her. There could be worst guests for dinner, Imrahil decided

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">The vintage blue Camaro pulled in front of the beautiful brown house. Imrahil brought the food inside, Tina close at his heals.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Hello!" thundered James, walking into the entry room after hearing the door "If it isn't my future niece-in-law!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Tina threw her arms around his neck "Hello, Uncle James!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil put his head in his hands "I'm not dating her anymore, remember Uncle James?"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Well you should be" whispered James "She's a nice young lady, and would make a wonderful addition to the family. I'd marry her myself, if I were your age."

<p class="MsoNormal">Tina, hearing some of it, blushed.

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil, with no reply, took the Chinese food into the dining room, and was met with the excited cheer of a hungry family.

<p class="MsoNormal">Itallie was sitting at the head of the table, reading the New York Times. She gave Tina a lingering glare

<p class="MsoNormal">"Well look what the cat dragged in"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Meow" said Tina sarcastically

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil took his food into the living room where Tina insisted on sitting next to him. They were allegedly alone, but ears from all over the house were pointed towards the room.

<p class="MsoNormal">"C'mon, Immy, when are you going to break down and date me?"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Look, Tina, you're beautiful and all, but-"

<p class="MsoNormal">"But what?? You're single, Immy, single as a pringle."

<p class="MsoNormal">"What is that even supposed to mean?? Forget it... the point is, that I don't think our personalities-"

<p class="MsoNormal">"singlesinglesinglesinglesingle"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Pardon?"

<p class="MsoNormal">"singlesinglesinglesinglesingle"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Now please, Tina, listen to me-"

<p class="MsoNormal">"singlesinglesinglesinglesinglesinglesingle"

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil put his head in his hands

<p class="MsoNormal">"singlesingle.... single."

<p class="MsoNormal">"Are you quite through, Tina?"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Maybe."

<p class="MsoNormal">"Tina, I love you like a sister..."

<p class="MsoNormal">"But that makes our relationship incestuous"

<p class="MsoNormal">"There's no relationship to MAKE incestuous!!!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"But you're going to marry me, soooooo"

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil drove his head farther into his hands

<p class="MsoNormal">"Tina, I'm not going to marry you."

<p class="MsoNormal">"Oh, you'll come around eventually. What more do you need?? I have a beautiful smile, red hair, a charming face..."

<p class="MsoNormal">"Not to mention humility!" shouted Itallie from the dining room

<p class="MsoNormal">"Listen, Tina..." said Imrahil "It wouldn't be right for me to date you on your beauty alone."

<p class="MsoNormal">"I don't just have looks, I have... I have.... well, looks are pretty much it, but you've got to admit I'm pretty damn gorgeous."

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil pondered for a moment

<p class="MsoNormal">"Good point" he conceded

<p class="MsoNormal">"C'mon, Imrahil... we can just date until you find a new girlfriend, eh? You haven't dated anyone since you broke up with me... all I dated was Wall-idiot Wells... Let's just do it to keep up appearances, eh?"

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil hesitated to open his mouth. What was he getting into

<p class="MsoNormal">"Okay, Tina, you win. we can start by going out to dinner.... I hate Chinese"

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">A few moments later, Tina walked out the front door with Imrahil close at her heels

<p class="MsoNormal">"Where are you going??" said Itallie with surprise

<p class="MsoNormal">"Olive Garden" said Imrahil "Tina and I are back together"

<p class="MsoNormal">"What?!" screamed Itallie

<p class="MsoNormal">Imrahil gave a suave smile and put on his sunglasses. "Wildcard, big sis, WILDCARD!!"